This is a four in one deal. Let’s get that straight first. There are four components to the writer of this blog, and they all have names.
Jagombaka: She is in charge, most of the time. Jagombaka is a dholuo word that means ‘mwenye anapenda kupiga story’ or ‘someone who likes having conversations’. But it can have negative connotations, depending on who you speak to. Then again, none of us is perfect. She is the one who likes to talk, to make meaningful conversation, serious or otherwise, and always tries to make an impact with words.
Jasigana: Means ‘storyteller’. She listens, watches and waits. Hers is a form of patience that can be unnerving to watch, and her gathered efforts are never in vain. When she speaks, the stories she tells echo in your very bones.
Ng’atma yudo gikmoko: ‘Finder of things’. He, more than anything else, is ravenous. Hungry for more, he is constantly and consistently curious, but at the same time confident and comfortable in his own state of nothingness. In activation he is a thing of wonder, and while calm he is the glue that keeps sanity.
Mudho: ‘Darkness.’ The shadowy personality who conjures up tears and misery and nothingness from nowhere. Every now and again, it touches me in the form of nightmares and dark thoughts. It is a form of dark shadow who sometimes takes over, without warning and often without explanation. Much like a shape shifter, Mudho is not beholden to a single form and distresses by its very existence.
These four make up the writer Awino Lesley, and may explain why there may be a difference even in the things I write about from time to time.