Once…it seems such a long time ago now…. But once, I took a blade to my wrists. I was tired of living, even though I had no particular reason I could pinpoint as to why. To say the least, highschool was a mess. All I knew is I was constantly thinking about it, constantly crying alone in corners, and would often sing at night in the secluded area of the empty pool to try and keep the tears from falling. To be fair, I also sang when I was happy, but that was entirely different.
Anyway, back to the point where I took the blade to my wrists. I sat there thinking about it for quite a while, and then finally put blade to skin. Only for one of my friends back then to walk in and stop me. And then came the Kamukunji (intervention). It turns out when friends have an idea of what you could be going through, you become a conduit for support…which was actually a big help. That is one time in my life I felt the least alone.
Now, even though I still cry with no provocation whatsoever, and still have negativity running through me, I think perhaps it is now more normal levels… (I hope). Perhaps my biggest problem was the bano (marble) in my throat when it came to, or rather, comes to asking for help. (Still have that). Which is why the article below was so comforting to read. Now, whereas I understand everyone with depression may experience it in different magnitudes, I find hope in the fact that it is both manageable and in possibly can even be eradicated entirely. So, take hold of the issue, and own it first of all. Then maybe outright clinical depression can become a thing of the past. (A girl can dream, right?)
Originally posted on Chibueze’s blog: ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? I’ve always wanted to write on this topic, even long before I started blogging, I always wanted to share my ideas and thoughts on depression and how it can be challenged. In this post I’m going to be giving points that…